Hello People,
well I didn't pick up the results to my bloods this week. I will get them on Tuesday even though I could have gotten them last week. I was SO busy last week.
I got a bit stressed actually.
I have been approved to have a nanny for 4 to 5 days a week for free because of the FA and recovering from pneumonia for 13 weeks. While this is really helpful I have also been a bit worried about things like, "how will Isaac and all the grandparents bond when I have a nanny around all the time"..."will I have any private time to myself or be followed around all the time"..."the days when Alan is home...do I have to share him with the nanny and will we ever be able to have time alone"...."when will we be able to just be a family" and "will familiy members stop visiting me because I now have a nanny to help".....and it goes on and on...I have freaked out and had trouble sleeping and been crying and feel strange and feel weird about welcoming someone who I don't know into the house and all sorts. My mouth has ulcers and inflammation througout which I know is always associated with major anxiety. I don't know how I used to live with this high anxiety a year or so ago...it is exhausting. I was worried that the nanny we had tried thought she had the job and yet I want to trial numerous nannies and choose between them.
Besides all of this...the nanny who we had the last 2 days of the week was really good and I can talk to her easily. She is not arrogant and works well with the mother at home and Isaac does like her....she is very good so I will put a tick by her name as one that I like a lot....so my anxiety is not based on her character but everything else that I worry about. However, having a nanny will make me be able to cope better while having so many appointments. It allows me to rest when I need to and be the best mum to Isaac. I thank Jennifer from FA because she has helped me to see this more as well.
It will help me and I we did apply for this because it will help me but when something happens that is new....you panic about how it is gonna fit in with everything else when it actually happens....we are funny as human beings I think.
I panicked when I employed my private nanny on a Thursday but now I couldn't do without her. She is wonderful and one of the family.....and I get rest and am able to be a proper mum with her around and we can go on outings and I have help and don't get as tired and when I am tired she tries to help me as well as look after Isaac. It is the best thing! So This other nanny who will come those other days...it should work out...and I will still see my family and get to do different things and get rest....
Friday this week is my infusion...please pray that goes well..I will have more bloods done again.
Ok, pray my tongue gets better and my mouth.
Our holiday is only 2 weeks away! YES!
I think I am finally not having trouble with my lungs from the pneumonia anymore...I don't puff! I think it is now just my whole body still getting fit and getting well...my marrow is taking longer than the lungs to get itself in order...but that is ok...they told me it would take longer. At least I don't get puffed anymore and any exhaustion I feel is not related to me not having good lung capacity...it is all FA slow recovery stuff!
Ok, got to go....need to go to church tonight.
Love Charisse
11 comments:
Hey Charisse, I can tell by your post that you have been very stressed. I could also tell towards the end that things are better and less stressed. I am glad for that. I am also glad you got some help in the form of a nanny. I haven't ever had help, but man there were times that I really wanted some but we were not able to. I am sure that it will be great help to you but not get in the way of your family life. Take it easy, enjoy the help, and know that I am praying for you always.
God be with you,
Judy
'Be anxious for nothing but by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving make your request known to God, and the peace of God which suppases all understanding will guard your heart and mind through Christ Jesus.Meditate on all those things that are true,noble,just, pure, lovely of good report, of virtue and praiseworthy'We pray that God will bring somebody you will bond with quiet well,sothat you can get enough rest to recover.Hang in there my sister God has good things in store for you. FLO
Praying right now!
1 Peter 3:12a For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers
Hey Charisse,
I have the same feelings about having a nurse in our house all the time but it does help! It does allow you to get the rest you need and be in peak condition when you get to spend time with Issac! That is a good thing! It will work out! It will! God will send exactly who and what you need!
Blessings and Bear Hugs,
Hi charisse, I am praying for you and everything we´ll be best on your side.
God be with you.
Zaitoon
Still here praying daily!
Psalms 119:76-77 Let, I pray thee, thy merciful kindness be for my comfort, according to thy word unto thy servant. Let thy tender mercies come unto me, that I may live: for thy law is my delight.
On late tonight so picking a verse that has gotten me through so much. I hope it blesses you, too. Praying!
Psalms 50:15 And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.
Continuing to pray!
Ps.46:10a, 11: Be still, and know that I am God...The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge.
Still here praying!
Psalms 62:8 Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.
You're in my thoughts and prayers today.
Psalms 62:5 My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.
Lifting you up in prayer right now!
Jude 1:20-21 But ye, beloved, building up yourselves on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Ghost, Keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life.
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